That's Mrs. Rivera

You know, I didn't think that things would change much after we got engaged and I was right. Things haven't changed, but I have. It's really hard to describe the difference (I've had this post in draft mode for 92348752345 weeks), but dammit, I'm gonna try!

I feel more important. That's not to say that Wil didn't make me feel important before he "put a ring on it" because he always has. I just feel like I matter even more now. He chose me to be the one person to stand by his side for the rest of his life. That's a really BIG honor! In response to that, I feel the need to thank him with my every thought, action and breath. I want to spend the rest of my life reminding him that he made the right choice.

"R" is for Rivera.
I feel more noticed. Since New Years Eve, I've been carrying myself differently when I'm out in public. I feel that I'm a walking representation of him and our family of two. Everything I do or say is a direct reflection of our relationship and the image we present to the world. I find myself thinking before every decision I make: "Is this something that my Love Cub would be proud of? Is this something that he'd be honored to be associated with?" If there's a silent question as to why Wil picked me to be his wife, I want my conduct to scream in reply: "Oh, that's why."

I'm certain that I'm going to go through a similar transition once we tie the knot 191 days from now. I'm not sure if it's just going to be an exaggeration of the changes I've gone through over the past couple of months, but I DO know that there will be a change. I'm really looking forward to being known as Mrs. Rivera (if you couldn't tell). I want to be even more important. I want to be even more noticed. I want to be an icon. I want to be a person people aspire to be. Most importantly, I want to be known as and envied for being Wilfredo Rivera's wife. I want people to look at my Honey Love and think, "That lucky bastard." 

I don't know if he feels the same way (I'm going to ask him tonight), but there's no question whether he makes me proud of him everyday. He keeps me pushing...keeps me climbing. I feed off the fruit of his successes and feel the pain of his failures. With his heart and our future in mind, I put my best foot forward everyday. As gay as it sounds, I'll admit...he makes me want to be a better woman. On second thought, I'm pretty sure he feels the same way (I'm still going to ask him about it because it'll make for pretty good conversation).

Okay, I'm done. I intended to expand on this a little more (there are two more paragraphs under this one right meow), but 92348752345 weeks in draft haven't magic'd them into coherent thoughts. All I know is that I want to be the picture of a happy woman in a healthy relationship with a strong man-a poster "child" for love, respect and success in it's human form. I want people to look at me, think of him and be able to see how loved, respected and successful he is. I want to be the best Mrs. Rivera I can be!

1 comment

Wilfredo Rivera said... May 6, 2011 at 7:16 AM

No youuuu want to best the Mrs. Rivera ;-). I'm very fortunate to have you in my life, love you babe.

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